Monday, May 13, 2013
With my birthday coming up, I find myself increasingly hopeful that year 18 will finally be healthy. It may be far stretched, but it's hope, and it's what people fighting illness need to hold on to. I've been looking into future options, one being working a part time summer job for only a few hours multiple days a week. It would be easier on my body and also keep me out and about. Another is to keep training horses to build my experience level and clientele for future training, instruction, and maybe even horse massage therapy. I've entertained the idea of moving in 2014 after getting my High School diploma. All these things, that I could shoot for if I just had a break. One thing I know for sure is that I'm on the IV treatment, that helps with my mental clarity so I can work on small amounts of schoolwork. I hope to definitely graduate in January of 2014. As for all the rest, I'm unsure how I'll feel and where I'll be going. My insurance runs out May of 2014, and that will leave me without medicine. In theory, a few more months of a strong IV should resolve the co infections and Lyme. I am praying that theory is on my side, because in October it will be six years since I came down sick with that unknown illness, causing the daily headache and body pain. Six years too long, and goodbye to the teenage years and the chance to live a normal time in my life, as I enter legal adulthood in 11 days. I enter the adult world with more experience and street smarts than many teenagers ever get. I have more medical knowledge, life knowledge, and personal knowledge than some people twice my age. I can speak in public, stand up for myself, be aware of my surroundings, take part in full blown medical conversations, and debate a subject strong enough to knock many people off of their feet. These are lessons it takes some people a lifetime to learn and practice, and some may never get to such a point. Lessons that will not be replaceable, and even through being sick I can be forever thankful for what I know. One day I will be a tool, used in the world to make things better with my position in my life. I'm excited to see the day where I can look back and say It was all worth it.